Sometimes the second step it’s just listening, even if there is silence. We don’t have to always fill the silence with words.
In a psychotherapy session, for example, you do an intervention but the outcome does not always happen instantly after.
Other times, I prefer to express my own feelings about the feelings of my interlocutor.
Answering your question, being aware of our feelings doesn’t make us understand them in an intellectual aspect or level.
Let’s remember Pascal: “The heart has its reasons of which reason knows nothing”.
Not always, but sometimes, it helps to be aware of the emotion, especially when the emotion is driving our actions without knowing.
I can argue with my wife and list a lot of reasons for my cause, but if I’m not aware that I’m doing that because of my anger and not because of my reason, I’m just hurting her and myself.
Just being aware of my anger makes me stop, pause or not going too far with my words until the anger goes away.
And, I don’t use it as often as I should also. Sometimes we are in the inertia of work, daily tasks, family issues…
Thanks for reading and sharing!
(I wrote a first response in the wrong place, I think, so this may be duplicated. I still don’t understand how responses work in Medium.)